I love to help people...a lot of what I do, in work and volunteer work is helping people. And I love it, really. I love being helpful and making their lives easier.
On a wedding day, I like to relieve the bride of all the little but necessary responsibilities, so that she doesn't need to stress about them. At work, I love to see a task and take care of it, so others don't need to it. I love to make their job easier.
But there's a catch. I quite like to be noticed and admired for all these things I do. It's not huge, just an expression of thankfulness for what I've done. It doesn't seem like it's that much to ask, right? I'm helpful...Recently though, I think my desire to help has been overtaken by wanting to be noticed as being helpful.
"Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not men."
"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men."
What I do is *not* about being noticed. It's not a matter of having the great, happy feeling of someone being happy with me when I'm done. It not about warm fuzzies. It's not about praise I receive. It's about working wholeheartedly for the Lord. That's all. That is literally all that matters.
Anyone else have a hard time with this?
I do think that God puts situations in our lives that will challenge these issues we have. Refining work. That's where I'm at. Recognizing where God wants to take me, but resisting and not enjoying the process of getting there.